Breaking My Own Rules

I woke up today and my covers were mad at me. I don't know what happened or if I should apologize. I woke up and they were gone, sleeping on the floor at the foot of the bed. Not a word. Me and covers are usually closer than Oprah's thighs, so you can imagine how perplexed I was to find out that they wanted nothing to do with me. Maybe I got drunk last night off of all that water and tea, then went and told them how I really felt about our "situation." That's probably it. Sounds like me.

Anyways, I'm feeling pretty full of myself right now and figure that anything I put up here will be good enough. Thus, I've decided to fall back on the crowd pleasing classic: link dumping and random thoughts. Enjoy. Stick it in your mouth, it's delicious.

• T-Shirt of the day. This goes out to a special someone who I care about deeply.
  

• Alborz, Brandon and myself have about a week or two left to live. The second our genuine Hamas hats arrive, I'm more than sure we will be stabbed for reasons that should be extremely obvious to all that know us.
  

• White Ninja comes up with probably one of the better comics of all time. Still the best comic of all time.

• I don't know why, but my email sending has all but stopped as of late. I cannot explain it, but I'm going to whore myself out right now. Write me something clever, bitches.
  

• Speaking of email, I have over 100 Gmail invitations to give out to anyone looking to change addresses or just add a new one to the repertoire. Comment if you want one.
  

• THIS video will haunt my dreams. It also justifies my life-long hobby of punching infants.

• Probably the 100th Brokeback Mountain parody video that's been forwarded to me, but it's one of the better ones. Spongeback Mountain.

• Still not quite over THIS picture.
  

• How celebrities would look if they had Tom "all that is man" Selleck's amazing mustache. Link.

• The new permanent link on the sidebar and one of three sites I make sure to read every damn day.

I'm starting to bore myself, so I must bid you adieu.

Hey Geoff

Hey Blog

So what the hell are you doing up so early?

I don't know, I couldn't sleep. What about you?

I'm a blog. I don't sleep.

Touche'

So how's everything going?

Well. Everything is going well.

Anything new and exciting going on in the wild world of Geoff?

I guess the answer is yes and no. I mean something new and exciting is starting, but it's sort of been there all along. Not to mention that looking at certain things about this, I'm already scared out of my mind. I don't know what else to say beyond that.

Scared out of your mind? hahahaha!

Play in traffic.

I'm just fucking with you, get a grip. Did you want to explain?

Not anymore.

Come on...

Eat shit.

Fair enough. So any plans tonight or this weekend?

Not yet. I never seem to make plans until about 8 or 9 pm the night of. Procrastination is one of my redeeming qualities. I guess if anyone wants to meet up, call me. There are definetly things I'd like to do and people I'd like to see, but we'll see what happens.

Alright, well this was fun, but it's time to go.

Stay Classy.

Wave Of Mutilation

I was going to come on here and write this big, ambitious and happy article. I mean, personally, I'm doing wonderful. Yet, here I sit solemnly. Somber and tired. Water sitting in front of me and the opening instrumental to The Cure's "Homesick" flowing slowly in the background.

I got up rather early, so I could fit a workout and few other activities into my day before the Canada/Russia Olympic Hockey game. 11:30 am and I was all hyped up and ready to go. Then we lost and it was as if the air was sucked out of my sails. I have to admit that we didn't deserve to win, for a second, but the fact that we didn't win still makes me want to punch infants. Not that I never stopped wanting to punch infants, but you get the point.

You scare me.

Insert Title Here

I'm a fucking winner. God I love me. I love me so much that all I'm doing right now is sitting in my boxers drinking a beer and combating world hunger. Of course by "beer", I mean water and by "world hunger", I mean my boredom. I left Christina's party because I was tired, and because the bar seemed to be the center of the douchebag universe, but now I'm sitting here unable to sleep and left with nothing to do.

I don't want to be pushy so I'm not going to call you. If you want to talk, call me or come over if you want. I'll be up.

Blogging Freestyle

Alrighty, I'm going to just wing this one and see where it takes me. I'm going to just simply write my inner monologue. No stopping, no proof reading or editing. The only thing I will do is spell check at the end so it doesn't look like trash. 5:18 pm. Here we go...

Shhhh... It's a secret.

In my last post I alluded (and linked) to a reputation I've earned because of my refusal to want to get serious with females. My refusal to want to commit in any way shape or form. It's a problem I've always had, a fun problem, but a problem none the less. I usually end up just wanting to have fun and don't want to have to worry about all the "other" stuff. Yeah, I know I'm an asshole and all, but is that any sort of News Flash to anyone of you? Honestly?

Okay back to the point of the post, which as of right now I have no idea what it's going to be. Oh yes, the secret. Right. Well, bottom line is that if I really like someone and can see myself having more than just a sexual relationship with, I don't sleep with them. Once I start feeling a certain way, I shut down. I can't even really make a move. As I stated in my last drunken post, I get drunk and then let them know how I feel, but I can't make that first crucial step to get the show on the road. I don't know what it is to tell you the truth. Maybe it's that I want to sabotage something before it starts so I don't get hurt? Maybe I just want to keep our perfect friendship the way it is? If you know me, you know this is true. Blah blah blah... I'm a pussy.

I don't know what else to write. I'm just thinking of last night and the things I should have done differently. It was beyond perfect and I think one of the better times I've had in a long time, but I froze. We'll see what happens tonight. Maybe I'll start acting like myself again.

5:27 pm

I'm Probably Making This Up

Combining me with feelings is like combining any guy, living or dead, with a kick to the nuts. I don't like it and we all definitely don't like it. Honestly, I'd rather be subjected to a Coldplay CD listening marathon than keep having to...

This is why I said I hate the fact that I feel this way. This is why I would get up and leave or just ignore "the situation." I don't like talking about my feelings and I don't like being put in these situations.

Well, come to think of it, I've never been in this situation before. I've earned a reputation because I've never been in this situation before and right now, Geoff's dealing with it in classic Geoff fashion. Geoff only talks about it when he's drunk.

What to do? What to say?

Do I tell you I'm probably happiest when I'm alone with you? Sitting. Sipping. Driving. Eating. Sleeping. Whatever.

Do I tell you that even from across a room, when we lock eyes I don't want to look away?

Do I tell you that when I wake up and see you laying there, I don't want to leave bed? Even though I'm wide awake?

I can tell you, but telling gets old.

Happy V.D.

It's true. I'd like to wish everyone a very happy Hallmark Holiday! There really is no point to this post beyond that, I'm just bored and waiting for a phone call to tell me where I'm going. Look, I know I'm going to hell, but here's to hoping I have some company.

Look for an actual post in a day or so.

Brokeback Weekend

I don't know what I could say that would do this past weekend any justice. I don't know where I'd even begin. I guess the beginning would be as good a place as any, but following any sort of structure in writing this would be such an injustice to the weekend itself that I couldn't bring myself to do it.

If you had told me before hand that we would have spent the weekend being sold out by half of the people who were supposed to come, I would have told you that I'd be pissed. I wasn't. It was perfect. And if you had told me that one of the horses would go blind and crazy and then end up having to be put down, I would have thought it would have ruined the weekend. It didn't. It's just another story and the ticket to another weekend.

You see, the past couple of days were perfect in their imperfections. From people not showing up and people selling out, to a horse dying and a 2 hour car ride worth of comfortable silence, it was beautiful. I'd write a more detailed recap, but this post is going to be like the weekend itself, over way to soon.

I Won't Write This Post

The Superbowl has come and gone. It has, in fact, gone so far away now that I won't even write up a recap of my trip to Seattle this past Sunday.

I won't write about the ride there and my hijacking of a "Support Your Troops" car magnet that is now proudly displayed on the back of the beemer.

I won't write about partying in the QWest Field parking lot.

I won't write about the bar with about 1000 people and two sides that we found ourselves watching the game in.

I won't write about the game and how the referee's should be hung.

I won't write about how Alborz disappeared with two Japanese tourists.

I won't write about the size of his smile upon returning 20 minutes later.

I won't write about getting kicked off of live television because I decided to throw in "George Bush doesn't care about black people" while being interviewed about the game.

I won't write about singing the Canadian National Anthem in the bar with a group of Canadians that we met down there.

I won't write about the old lady... Definitely won't write about the old lady.

I won't write about the bum who told me I'm 'good people' and that he was thinking of coming to Vancouver to visit.

I won't write about the hotel room and my souvenir scarf.

I won't write about Alborz driving us back at 2 am.

I won't write about how afraid I am to ever have Alborz drive me anywhere ever again. Ever.

I won't write about how much terror we caused in the city of Seattle and how amazingly fun it all was.

I won't write a better post tomorrow.

Comfort In Company

Wednesday was good day. Wait, let me rephrase that, Wednesday was a comforting day. I spent it relaxing and just, well, taking it easy. From sitting and joking in a tea room, to driving aimlessly for two hours while talking about everything and listening to anything. With all the laughs and comfortable silences, it reminded me of those summer months where we spent everyday together doing nothing, but at the same time doing everything.